Friday, May 23, 2008

The Case for Being a Homebody
By Monica Crowley (bio)

First went the rubber chicken.

Back in the day, when you’d travel by airplane, you knew that for the decent amount of money you were spending to fly, you’d at least get a meal. It wasn’t a great meal—most of the time it wasn’t even a good meal—but it was a warm meal. Something to make you forget you were flying at 30,000 feet in a steel tube.

The first sign that airline travel was going right into the loo was the bagel.

Instead of a meal, airlines began featuring “bagels in a bag” that you could grab as you entered the aircraft. The bagel was hard as a rock and freezing cold and the accompanying cream cheese was unspreadable, but at least they were still giving you something to nosh on.

Then the bagel went away and we were offered sad bags of peanuts—-bags so tiny mice wouldn’t think it was worth it to gnaw through them.

And then the peanuts went away and were replaced by dry, cold miniature pretzels. At least the peanuts had some protein.

Now, American Airlines is becoming the first to charge for your first checked bag. And thirty U.S. cities have been dropped by the airlines for service altogether.

Soaring fuel prices mean higher airline prices for you and me. We’re paying more—much more—for a lot less service and disappearing creature comforts that—as we get crammed in clutching our minuscule bags of carbs—reminded us that we were human beings.

All of the presidential candidates talk about what they are prepared to do on Day One as the new Chief Executive. I know we’ve got pressing issues with regard to Iraq, Iran, North Korea, the economy, energy, health care, and so on. But perhaps on Day Two or Three, the new president could spend five minutes thinking about how to get us off the ground, in the air, and back on the ground in a more civilized and efficient way.

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