Monday, December 1, 2008

My New Parrot

Recently I received a parrot as a gift.

The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.
Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with
profanity.

I tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently
saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else I could
think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, I was fed up and I yelled at the parrot.

The parrot yelled back.

I shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder.

So, in desperation, I threw up my hands, grabbed the bird and
put him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then suddenly there was total quiet.

Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that I'd hurt the parrot,

I quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto my outstretched arms and said


"I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and
actions.

I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and
I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and
unforgivable behavior."

I was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

As I was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic
change in his behavior, the bird continued,

"May I ask what the turkey did?"


H/T Jeri H

"USS Enterprise & FS Charles de Gaulle"

Portugal has a navy?


"A Soviet submarine through the eyes of a Portugese corvette - Cold war 1983"

"Lt. Col. David Dressel, a pilot with the 75th Expeditionary Fighter Squadron, poses in front of an A-10 Thunderbolt II at Bagram Air Field, Afghanistan. Dressel, a native of Watertown, Minn., has flown more than 3,000 hours in the A-10 and is on track to reach 500 combat hours during his current deployment."

via


Construction Of A Museum In Kogelo.

Raw Video; The Moment 'Mumbai Gunman' Was Captured & Beaten



Dec 1, 2008

"Moment 'Mumbai Gunman' Was Captured
Sky News has obtained mobile phone footage of alleged terrorist Ajmal Qasab being captured and beaten following the attacks that killed more than 170 people in Mumbai. It is thought he was the only attacker to survive. This clip has no commentary."

Mullahs Stage Collapses - Ranting Still Goes On



"Tribal leaders in South Waziristan under the leadership of Maulvi Nazir are lecturing when the stage crumbles."

UFO enthusiasts call on Obama to release X-Files

"UFO enthusiasts are pressing Barack Obama to release classified documents about sightings of alien spacecraft, encouraged by support from within the President-Elect's own White House team."

more

Britons 'saving money with sex'


As the credit crunch bites, Britons may be turning to sex as a cheap way to pass the time, a charity says.

A YouGov survey of 2,000 adults found sex was the most popular free activity, ahead of window shopping and gossiping.

The Scots were most amorous with 43% choosing sex over other pastimes, compared with 35% in South England.

more

9 Headless Bodies Found in Mexican Border City

"TIJUANA, Mexico — The bodies of nine decapitated men were found in a vacant lot in Tijuana Sunday, part of a wave of violence that claimed at least 23 lives over the weekend in this border city plagued by warring traffickers, authorities said."

more

"This woman with the flag of the Papuan independence movement painted on her face takes part in a protest in Jakarta calling for independence from Indonesia."

Dreamy

Suddenly theft is bad?

And don't dare think outside that box